you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
