Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
