Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
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