you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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