We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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