The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
