We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
It's never too late to be topless.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize
