sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize