when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
