Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
barbara walters just said penis...
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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