in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Randomize
