So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
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