At least make sure they are 18
Why
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
