Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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