he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
