ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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