Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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