Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize