When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize