She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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