i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize