Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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