U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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