Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
