i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
it's like heaven, but drunker
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
