that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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