Small penises have feelings too.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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