Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
this hospital has no fireball
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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