He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
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