so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
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