great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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