Whatcha textin bout Willis?
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize