More tranny stories later!
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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