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belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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