Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
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