One girl and one boy is just not enough.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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