I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
