16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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