The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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