Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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