FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Randomize