why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
this beer tastes like vomit already
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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