the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize