I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth