Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
