....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
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