I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Randomize
