So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
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You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
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You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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