C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
