the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I have fence marks all over my body
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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